No, it’s NOT a musical about unfair wages for cheap trendy clothes! IT IS SO MUCH BETTER THAN THAT.
As a young girl who likes putting together an outfit before I walk out the door, working with a college student budget makes attempting to be fashionista rather challenging. So yes, certainly, from time to time slash ALWAYS I can appreciate the allure of the Forever21 retail chain of glory that touts blatant designer knockoffs and costume jewelry that turns your fingers green or falls apart by the time sequins and studs are out of style anyway.
I’ve been excited for quite some time, then, for the new Forever 21 in the middle of Times Square (in the old Virgin Megastore building), mere BLOCKS from where I intern. I could see many a lunch break wasted roaming the bowls of cocktail rings.
Imagine my delight when I got to go to the GRAND OPENING at 10am on Friday, June 25th! This was no average grand opening. IT WAS A PEP RALLY EXTRAVAGANZA OF APPROPRIATELY OUTRAGEOUS 21ST BIRTHDAY-LIKE PROPORTIONS!!!
Approaching the black velvet ropes, the first 1,000 guests got $10 gift cards handed to them. AND THEN. WHEN YOU WALKED INSIDE. THERE WAS THE ENTIRE STAFF. CLAPPING. AND CHEERING. WITH YELLOW NAMETAGS. AND THEY HANDED YOU THESE CANVAS SATCHELS. WITH TANK TOPS INSIDE. AND ON YOUR WAY OUT THE DOOR YOU GOT AN ALUMINUM WATER BOTTLE. AND IT WAS JUST. JUST…. FOREVER21 DAY IS THE BEST DAY!
I now have an official stance on all those “labor laws” and “slave wage” rumors that always seem to come up when I walk in the door post-excursion, and I’m holding a trademark fluorescent yellow plastic bag with a secretive psalm on the bottom: the stance is that: LOOK. IT’S A RECESSION. IF I CAN GET A BREEZY BEACH DRESS FOR $13.50, YOU CAN BE SURE THAT I AM GOING TO BE WEARING THAT DRESS TO THE BEACH! Hrrrrumph.
This store is 4 stories of AMAZING GLORY and all o y’all can enjoy spending $300 too much on that silk romper, cause this poly-blend should be more than sufficient to romp around in at my age.