I love smartwater more than Jenn. I always love having a water bottle on me, and the size of the larger smartwater bottles are just big enough without being monstrous, and they’re just small enough that I can tote them around and feel like a cool post-gym celeb.
Best of all, smartwater bottles allow for the SMARTWATER GAME!!
Did you know that all the bottles of smartwater have a little animal on the inside of the packaging? As an advertising major, things like this excite me far more than they should. The bottles are so sleek and sexy and minimalist and then OOP! SURPRISE CUTE WIDDLE BITTY GOLDFISHY ON THE INSIDE! It’s the MOST delightful treat.
But the animals don’t stop at the goldfish. There’s environmentally conscious whimsical messaging with each animal, from an otter, to a duck, or a frog or crab! When buying a new bottle, I never peek and the game is to try to guess the animal you may get, and hope for a good one. The goldfish used to be the most aggressively ubiquitous and you’d ALWAYS get the goldfish, so you’d hope for the more elusive duck or crab. My latest snag was the otter, who reminds us that we should always drink responsibly and recycle, “you know you otter!”
The sheer delight in my day that is the smartwater bottles are a small treat that make purchasing the water well worth it. Oh, yeah, and I guess the actual water tastes great too. #likethatmatters.
I know, I know: the whole “going MAD,” “mad” world, “mad about Mad Men!” concept has been incredibly overdone, especially lately, but I couldn’t help but draw the Mad Hatter/ Mad Men comparison. As a student majoring in advertising, Mad Men is to the department as Samantha Jones was to PR, or Elle Woods to law schools. Everyone suddenly finds the field sexy and wonderful now that Don Draper lights up a Lucky Strike and makes it so. (and MY GOD does he make it so.) Mad Men has become uncomfortably integrated into my studies, and I know my peers can say much the same. My personal Intro to Advertising notes are riddled with references to the show. Surely I passed the class because rather than “account management” I wrote “Pete Campbell,” and where “art director” would be, my notes instead say “Salvatore Romano,” while the entire “copywriter” portion of the course is entitled “Peggy Olson.” I’m not completely naive, and obviously don’t expect that all agencies in this day and age down Maker’s Mark between meetings. Still, I’ve seen the offices at Y&R, and though there is no “secretarial pool,” there were certainly the ping-pong tables and Rock Band setups to prove that advertising is at least crazy fun, if it isn’t oozing sex.
After a grueling eight months, with only New York Magazine coverage to ease the longing for Roger Sterling’s silver locks, Mad Men is FINALLY BACK this Sunday! AMC is pulling out all the stops, including an updated MadMenYourself, Monday night “Best of” Marathons, the genius Banana Republic Casting Call Contest, and a Times Square Premiere Party that would delight the pants off any secretary. The PR and planning leading up to this season has been so brilliantly crafted, you’d thing only Don Draper himself could concoct this stuff. To honor Mad Men’s return to television, and America’s return to time-traveling, disbelief-suspending bliss (CAUSE I’M SORRY- NO WIFE WOULD EVER LEAVE A HUSBAND AT THIS TIME. I JUST DON”T BUY IT. ESPECIALLY NOT GUTLESS AND MINDLESS BETTY DRAPER, I DON’T CARE HOW CHARMING THIS HENRY FRANCIS MAY BE…), enjoy some of my favorite bits, spoofs, and aspects of arguably the smartest show on television that can appeal to a college student!
God– I mean Don Draper
Cooking & Laundry for Dummies Women
Mad Men in 60 Seconds
Betty Draper, Mother of the Year
Vanity Fair Explains Mad Men
Epitome of Why Don is An Epic Ad Man Scene: The Kodak Carousel
Another great Don pitch: Lipstick
Backstory: I was in a CVS and I saw a new product on the shelves that caught my eye in the dry foods aisle. The “NEW!” on the box is likely what drew my attention. What was this? I was certainly familiar with Townhouse crackers, Keebler’s response to competitor Nabisco’s Ritz cracker. So what was this pretzel component? ALAS. Ernest J. Keebler, the head Keebler elf and the FACE of the Keebler treehouse, had solved the common snacker’s dilemma: Pretzels? Or crackers? Fret no more, for Keebler Townhouse Flipsides are here to offer you BOTH IN ONE, SCRUMPTIOUS BITE. Brilliant! Or so I had thought, when half way through the box, I realized a critical flaw in Ernie’s cracker-baking method.
Think of the classic cracker. It is obvious that the elves have baked the crackers on a pan in a massive oven of sorts, and that there is one side of the cracker that was baked touching the pan, and another was facing up. One side is more bulbous, has squar-er pieces of salt, and the other was clearly on the pan. Sometimes this pan-touching side may have darker streaks where it must have touched the oven, and so forth. There is undoubtedly an upwards-facing side, and a pan-touching side to every cracker, and also every pretzel.
Baking the Flipsides is presumably no different, and there is one side to the cracker that faces up, and another that faces down. IF ERNIE THE ELF and his fellow Keebler elf friends have developed the baking technology to combine pretzel with cracker, how have they yet to develop a way to make an equally distributed pretzel-top, pretzel-bottom Flipside cracker?!?! In my frustrations and philosophical questionings, I decided to contact Keebler with my personal inquiry.
I assume Ernie himself was too preoccupied in his treehouse, so he had one of his minions respond two days later…
So there you have it. They seem to have no intention of giving the classic cracker its fair share of top sidedness, and Keebler is going to perpetuate the bigotry of crackerist inequality. Nonetheless, the crackers are CRAZY delicious and I really recommend them as a snacking alternative to the ever-popular and nauseating Cheez-It. End. Rant.